Yesterday afternoon I was in the allotment in my shorts giving the ground a good going over with the rotovator and this morning I’m making a cup of tea freezing my spuds off. March is like that, it provides glimpses of spring but is equally quick to snatch them away as soon as you put shorts on or take your coat off.
With the prospect of an overcast day ahead and a maximum temperature of six degrees, the good lady wife and I did what we sometimes do when we’re plain old bored and went for a ride in the car. One of our favourites on a cold day is Pennels Garden Centre. Not because we’re 80 years old or anything, but because it’s usually warm, there’s plenty to see and the prices are too expensive to actually buy anything. Unfortunately, today the builders were in as part of a make over and expansion so we had to cut our visit short. As we left the good lady had an urge to drive over to Torksey Lock for some bizarre reason, so off we went.
I’ve only ever been to Torksey Lock bargain hunting at the giant car boot sales they have in summer, but I’ve always fancied it looks pleasant enough. Just before we arrived I spied the caravan place and we pulled in for a look. The chap in the sales portacabin watched me manoeuvre up the side of a caravan, as there were no parking spaces. He then watched my wife get out of the car and put her coat on, then me and only when we’d locked it up and walked off did he bother to come out and ask us to move the car. Apparently, we were in the service area. I duly drove out of one gate and back in through another not 50 yards away and we repeated the procedure. As we started to look around we found that all the caravans and motorhomes were locked up. So the few customers they had were walking round looking through the windows and at the outsides. We saw the one sales chap following a couple with a set of keys so we assumed the procedure was for the customer to look through the windows and then go and see the salesman for an accompanied viewing of the inside. If this was the case then it doesn’t exactly say flexible and friendly does it? All the caravan, motorhome and car showrooms I’ve ever been to have the vehicles open for inspection all day. To not do so we thought was miserable and we left.
We then went across to the Lock Car Park where the sign in the car park stated it was for users of the lock and visitors ONLY. There is nothing else for miles around so why waste money on a sign and why write ONLY in capitals. It’s the literary equivalent of jabbing someone in the chest with your finger. There were of course numerous empty car parking spaces. We proceeded to walk past the tea shop to the lock itself; however, there was no way of going on the lock or near it because of another sign stating ‘no unauthorised persons on the lock’. There was also a sign saying no fishing, just in case anyone was thinking of enjoying themselves. Even the tea shop had a sign slap bang in the middle of both doors saying no access for pushchairs. That’s like having a sign saying no families. Why didn’t they have a sign saying please leave pushchairs outside or better still have no sign at all and if anyone arrived with a pushchair just politely explain it’s a bit tight inside and offer to let them park the pushchair outside.
We weren’t in Torksey Lock very long. As we left the good lady remarked that for a very small place Torksey Lock seems to have a lot of rules and could possibly be a contender for the most miserable place in Lincolnshire. I would vote for it to win.